Today is my fourth day on the 500 calories and it’s going well. Since Sunday I have lost a total of 10.6 pounds and yes the “.6″ is important to me because what that .6 means is that I am less than 1/2 a pound away from having lost a total of 11 pounds, that .6 gets me closer to my ultimate goal. It’s the small things in life that have the biggest impact, really.
I’m not going to sit here and tell you that my life has been sunshine and daisies since I started the 500 calories. Am I glad to no longer be loading? You bet ya. Do I really want a bagel? You have no idea. Every day I have to make another commitment to myself to not have a piece of chocolate, or to not have a piece of bread. That sounds ridiculous, I know, but it’s true. Everyday I have to make a new commitment to myself that I’m going to give myself my best.
Majority of my weight was lost Monday and Tuesday. Today when I woke up and weighed myself, it was the lowest loss I have had so far this cycle and, I’m not going to lie, it was extremely disheartening. I only lost 1.2 pounds which I know I shouldn’t be getting upset about because that’s 1.2 pounds lost in one day, when the average considered “healthy” goal is 1-2 pounds in one week. I’m not saying I don’t appreciate that loss, it’s just hard when Tuesday’s loss was 5.2 pounds. What is the difference, you ask? How did I lose so much one day in comparison to another? It absolutely has to do with working out. Walking is recommended while doing HCG and I didn’t walk yesterday, neither did I walk today. I practiced Roller Derby with my league on Monday night, hence the huge weightloss on the scale Tuesday morning.
The hardest thing I’ve noticed so far is finding the desire to walk. I know it doesn’t sound like that big of a deal, but it’s hard to find any motivation to do much of anything when you are eating only 500 calories per day. I need to do better at walking every day because I know I’ll see even better results and that is what I’m doing this for after all. I’ve found that I have no energy at the end of the work day to go to the gym to walk on a treadmill for an hour, which is saying a lot, because since the end of January up until recently, I was going to the gym every night for an hour and working out. Right now, though, I’m finding the simple task of normal brain functioning to be a little beyond me. Which means, mornings are when I’m going to have to go to the gym. I’ve got to make this work because I have to stay in the habit of going to the gym and working out. The last time I did HCG, I used the excuse of minimal calories to not go to the gym and I quickly got out of practice to the point that when I finally did return, it was reidiculously depressing to see how far I had slid in what I was able to do. That’s not going to happen this time. I can’t let that happen this time.
So where do I stand? I’ve lost 10.6 pounds and I am proud of that number. I am grateful for the 1.2 pounds I lost yesterday and I am excited to see what the number is tomorrow. Each day is getting me that much closer to the end goal and that’s all extremely positive so, I’m in a good place right now.
What this is about, is about making and keeping good habits. Before, it was about wanting to be sexy for my guy and it was about losing as much as I could in as little time as possible. I missed the whole concept that it should be about re-training myself to steer clear of the bad habits that got me to my size in the first place. This time, it’s about learning good habits and maintaining them, it’s about getting my health in control so I can live a long and healthy life with the love of my life, and it’s about learning to respect myself to live up to the higher expectations I am setting. Is it also about being sexy for my guy, but he thinks I’m sexy the way I am now, so… I’m a lucky girl that way. He deserves the best and so do I and that’s another thing this whole process is about, is I am learning to be my best self for myself, and therefore for the people who matter most in my life. I can do this. I will do this.
